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Questioning Lesbians – Natasja Hellenthal

This week’s Questioning Lesbians is with Natasja Hellenthal.

Natasja, was born and raised in The Netherlands. She has always enjoyed reading, observing and studying life; basically anything interesting around her! She loved being surrounded by nature and animals from a young age and could dream away for hours in a wild wood. Alas, there wasn’t much wild nature in Holland, so she left in her early twenties to search for greener pastures! She has travelled through Europe mainly after that, searching and experiencing life. I have lived and worked in Norway, Wales, Norther-Ireland and England. Interesting years! She now lives in the South of France.

Natasja has been visited by vivid dreams since she was very young and can remember bits of past lives. Since the age of 18 she has been writing these fragments down. Her writing is fuelled by her imagination, translated it to English over the years, and am published since 2014. The Queen’s Curse was her debut novel which became an international bestseller on Amazon.

Natasja is now a novelist with 10 books in total, but at heart she is also an eco-warrior, animal lover (and thus vegan) and equal rights activist. Her interests include reading the best (both fiction and non-fiction), poetry, space and science, ancient aliens, the unexplained, interesting movies, nature and art, and outdoor activities such as hiking, organic farming, swimming in the sea, paddle-boarding and cycling. She lives in the Pyrenees, South of France close to the sea which she needs for her well-being. Natasja co-parents two small children whom she adopted with her ex wife. She am always trying to help and save wildlife or collect plastic out of the sea.

Wow! Quite the bio! I love the past lives bit, I would love to know more about mine. But this isn’t all about me (who am I even kidding?), so, let’s get back to you. Tell me a bit about your books.

I have ten books! I can’t choose which ones to talk about! It’s like choosing between which of my children I want to discuss! I have a variety of books in the speculative genre. Each is different and unique. Click here!

Loving the subtle inclusion of a hyperlink there. You are officially my marketing hero! Tell me, who or what inspires you?

I am influenced by writers such as Tanith Lee, Kahlil Gibran, Patricia McKillip and Hermann Hesse. But also strong, independent people in general inspire me. Those who go in against the mainstream against all odds, who help others in times of need, who want to do good, who set the tone, who don’t give up despite ridicule or protest, who invent, who explore, who delve deep to find the answers, who expose the truth. One of my all time favourites is Dolores Cannon. Also, nature inspires me greatly! To be alone with my thoughts is a must! And last but not least: my partner, Kiki! She brings out the best in me, really. Together we come up with the greatest ideas too! She studied criminology, has done a variety of jobs, travelled and lived in different countries, and has an amazing sense of humour. She is currently writing ‘Confessions of a Flowerstand’ about her time as a “florist” in Vancouver. And together we are working on ‘Kiki’s Detective Service’.

Right, let’s get to the important stuff. Tell me about your favourite sandwich!

Homemade organic wholemeal bread with humus, fresh salad, cucumber, olives and cherry tomatoes!

I love hummus in a sandwich. I used to make a lovely hummus, roasted red pepper and lettuce sandwich, before I started eating distopian mush. Anyway, back to lesbians. Are your fictional lesbians questioning anything? If so, what?

Yes! Everything! Who they are, where they come from, how the world works, the universe, their bodies, where clouds come from, where the wind comes from, what is justice and what isn’t, what is good and evil, right and wrong, who decides what, what is a soul, where do we go where we dream, what are our minds, how are we connected, how we are brainwashed, conditioned, how we can change etc. So much!

Well, that is a lot of questioning, but then again, that’s what these interviews are all about! What about non lesbians? Do they question things?

Hahaha, well, I certainly hope so! I would say to them, “If you stop questioning, instead take things for granted, and don’t think for yourself, why do you live at all?” Just to live every day like the previous one, follow others, obey?

And I hope they would have a jolly good ponder of that. How about bisexuals? Twice the questions do you think?

The questions to what, I wonder? Their sexuality? I discuss this in my Comyenti Series actually! Call Off The Search features a supernatural, bisexual female, Sula, who is part of an alien humanoid species. They are all bisexual by nature, but she doesn’t know that as she knows little about her origins. This will come to light further on in the series… But the first two books do explore what it means for her in specific as she falls in love with the twins Felix and Feline.

And speaking of feline, cats or dogs?

I love all animals so that includes dogs and cats. I personally have a cat called Moona. She is the Queen. I don’t own her, she owns me.

As it should be. And where do you fall in the great pet couture debate?

I have never even heard of that! Is that a thing? I don’t think non-human animals are interested in fashion much and don’t have need for clothes like humans do (unless they have been domesticated or bred without hair, poor things!) Couture is a human concept and I’m against pushing our believes and behaviour onto “pets”.

And we were getting on so well… never mind. What inspired your latest book?

I have always wanted to write more about the supernatural beings I created for my Comyenti Series, they know so little about themselves, so I am in the process of writing the prequel to the series. To get to the bottom of things, so to speak! For them, myself, and my readers!

And if your book was an animal, what would it be?

My books are all different animals! I would say my debut novel ‘The Queen’s Curse’ is an elephant! They can walk nice and slow for hours, but also cause a stampede, attack if needed to defend, are immensely strong, thick skinned, but sensitive, wise and spiritual.

If you could question any lesbian, who would you choose and what would you ask?

Jodie Foster. Why did you wait so long with coming out?

Top three lesfic reads, quick smart!

The Dark Wife by S.E. Diemer – I love mythology and this is a great lesbian twist on Persephone’s story
Disturbed by her Song by Tanith Lee – Great collection of lesbian stories by the Queen of Fantasy
The Stone Gods by Jeanette Winterson – Intriguing, funny and well told sci-fi read.

Fabulous. And finally, who would you like to see next on Questioning Lesbians?

Angelika Miltiadis

I just checked my list of questioned lesbians, and she is not on it. If you’d like to send her to this link, I can give her the third degree.

And you can find Natasja all over the interwebs below.

https://natasjahellenthal.wordpress.com/

Questioning Lesbians – L.C. Mawson

You know what this is by now. I pin down a lesfic author and demand answers. I usually release them unharmed at the end. If you’re feeling brave and would like to take part then you can find the questions here.

L.C. Mawson is a cryptid who reportedly loves writing fast-paced genre fiction where girls kiss other girls, but is so rarely seen outside of her native habitat – her room – that it’s hard to verify.

I can already sense we’re going to get along, as I rarely leave my cave. But in these trying times we’re the new normal! Ha! Anyway, what would you like to talk about today?

My newest series, Ember Academy for Young Witches, is a YA Urban Fantasy Academy series that follows Amelia, a teenage lesbian who realises that she’s a Witch and that ancient forces may be out for her blood. Book One is available for pre-order and a prequel novella is now available to read for free: https://lcmawson.com/emberacademy/

That sounds fabulous. OK, so, we know you have fictional lesbians, but what are they questioning?

They’re usually questioning the institutions they’re trapped within and the validity of tradition.

This story is sounding right up my alley! OK, tell me what inspires you.

Anything and everything. And if that seems like too vague of an answer, my latest two examples of inspiration sources are “questions I have about the nature of community in the 21st century” and “an Undertale fan song that was stuck in my head.”

I mean… yeah… OK… um… Cats or dogs?

Cats (but also dogs are very good)

I’ll have to introduce you to my wonky ninja. OK, now the important stuff. What’s your favourite sandwich?

A crisp sandwich. Anything else can be in it as well, but there have to be crisps.

And almost certainly one of your 5 a day… um… yeah… So, pet couture, are you pro?

No, I always end up wondering whether or not the pet is happy with it.

And we were getting on so well until now… Never mind. Tell me what inspired your latest series.

Realising that I had yet to write a book in my Urban Fantasy universe with a vampire love interest.

There are vampires and you didn’t lead with this? I’m fine… if you could question any lesbian who would it be?

I’d ask Ruby Rose if the Batwoman wig makes it difficult to see. Seems like going from short hair in your day-to-day life to long hair when fighting would be the least practical way around, but I’d want to ask the person actually in the costume (or her stunt double).

OMG, I can’t believe she’s leaving us! Sniffles. Anyway thank you very much for stopping by. As you know, I have one reader, please let Kiko know where they can find you online.

https://lcmawson.tumblr.com/

Questioning Lesbians: CJ Murphy

Questioning lesbians is a section of the website where I chat to authors of lesbian fiction about the questionable lesbians they produce… If you write lesbian fiction and would like to answer some probing questions, you can find them here.

This week I am talking to CJ Murphy.

CJ Murphy has spent thirty years in the fire service and now uses her experiences to write stories of action, adventure, and mix them with her love of romance. She publishes with Desert Palm Press and won a Goldie for her debut novel frame by frame. CJ’s also written The Bucket List a clue filled adventure romance. Now she’s concentrating on her Five Points series with book one, Gold Star Chance and book two, Forever Chance.

So, let’s talk about your latest book. Gimme the skinny… (is that what the cool kids say? I haven’t been out of the flat for a while…)

Forever Chance continues the adventures of Sheriff Chance Fitzsimmons as she tries to get a handle on the opioid epidemic that has invaded her county and an employee who steps over the line. Her lover, Jax, has her own issues to deal with in a sinister visitor’s unwelcome sexual advances to her and her staff. The resolution will close a critical link in the chain of a high profile investigation, putting lives and a vow yet to be made, at risk. Both women are dedicated to finding that balance, and their “Forever Chance” is but a promise away if only they can survive to trudge the snow to say ‘I do.’

Wow, that sounds intense. Let’s dial it back a notch for the folks at home and talk sandwiches. Don’t think, just answer – favourite sandwich.

Pepperoni Roll

And speaking of questions, what, if anything are your fictional lesbians questioning?

In a future book in the current series, I have plans for a foster home filled with kids who have been deemed hard to place for their sexuality. Some will know who and what they are while others question everything.

What about non lesbians, do they have questions? Do you even care?

Non lesbians do questions, I’m sure. Of course I care.

That’s because you’re a firefighter. You have to care. Anyway, dogs or cats?

Dogs, but I love cats too!

And as an important follow up to that, are you pro pet couture?

No, my dog likes her WalMart T-shirt. 🙂

If your book was an animal, what would it be?

A K9 dog. 🙂 Well, there are several in the book.

I’d like a book that comes when it’s called… what inspired your latest book?

I wanted an action adventure series centred in a tourist county. I lived in the county I’ve set the series and have been in the emergency services dealing with the predicaments the tourists get themselves into for years. Law enforcement characters are always popular, so I combined the two.

Cool! And in terms of more general inspirations, who or what inspires you?

My wife asked me to start writing. My career lends to the stories I write and share with the readers. When I hear from them that I’m creating characters they’d like to know in real life, I know I’m getting it right.

Tell me, if you could question any lesbian, who would you choose and what would you ask?

Ellen DeGeneres- if you had to go through it all again, would you so it anyway?

And, I ask everyone this one – your top 3 lesfic reads?

Intersection – Nancy Healy – I love political thrillers, this series is fantastic, Fated Love – Radclyffe I love that romance between Docs. The Fall – Robin Alexander, because I LOVE to laugh.

We all need a laugh at the moment, and that’s for sure. OK, tell me who you’d like to see next on Questioning Lesbians?

KC Luck

Hmm. They are not on my list. If anyone knows them maybe send them my way… Anyway, as we know I have one regular website visitor, so please tell Kiko where we can find you online:

www.cjsmurphyslaw.com

https://www.facebook.com/CJMurphyAuthor/

Shiver Me Timbers or Until Death Don’t We Part

Written by C H Clepitt

A spot of ghost erotica from one half of the creators of A Grumpy Badger Guide to Dinosaur Erotica, and the *soul* creator of Broken Bareback: A Stable Romance.

Introduction

With the recent surge in the news about women marrying ghosts (just Google it, if you’re interested, that sentence literally covers it) and one even getting divorced again; wedded bliss to someone without a body clearly not being all she anticipated, I have been inspired to create this piece of fiction.  Whilst this has been inspired by true events, it is a complete work of fiction. All characters (living and deceased) places, and events are products of the author’s imagination. Any similarity to persons, ghosts, places or events is purely coincidental. As this is spoof erotica, it does, of course, contain naughty bits, so is rated 18+. If you are under 18 please go away and come back when you’re old enough.

As always, if this receives enough interest, I could be convinced to expand it into a full length book and publish it properly. Experience has taught me, however, that the interest pool is limited…

Part One: A Pirate’s Death

Well, it were a good death, as deaths go. I weren’t strung up, nor keelhauled, nor filled w’lead. They says I went mad in the end. Syphilis’ll do that to ye. I were quite the ladies man, truth be told. I’d had me share o’ pirate wenches, commoners and ladies. I think it were a lady that undid me in the end. It went like this… we were boarding the queen’s ship Yardarm, falsely named, if you ask me, for their cap’ain was a weedy little scoundrel, barely able to grow a beard. He cried and pissed himself before I ran him through.

It were policy aboard me ship to let the women and children go. We ain’t monsters, and we have honour, not matter what lies yer ‘istory books tells ye.  But this particular one weren’t goin’ without a fight. Cap’ain’s wife, cap’ain’s cabin. Me first mate comes out to me, says;

“Cap’ain, she won’t leave, she’s demandin’ parlay.”

“Parlay?” Says I, all confused like. “But we’re releasing her, what is there to parlay?”

“She’m don’t wanna be released, Cap’ain,” says he.

“Right you are, Jimmy,” says I, rolling up me sleeves and moving t’wards her cabin. “I’ll parlay.”

I knocked lightly on the door and enters, removing me hat as I does.

“Captain Goldcock?” she asks me, all proper, like. They calls me Captain Goldcock on account of Puck, me famous fighting cock, still undefeated to my knowledge.

“Yes, ma’am,” I nods respectfully as I enters the room.

“Do you mean to have your way with me?” she asks, all proper, like.

“No, ma’am,” I nods courteously. “You be free to leave the ship. We can set you in a lifeboat, or you can sail with us to land, and you has me word no harm’ll come te ye.”

“What if I don’t want to return to land?” she asks, sticking her chin at me, all stubborn like. She can’t be a day over one and twenty, and her skin is pale as ivory and smooth as the silk in me sails.  Her bosom heaves in her tight, proper dress, and I fingers the hilt of me sword, pondering whether I oughta cut it free.

“Well, ma’am,” I says, ignoring the twitching in me trousers at the sight of her catching her breath. “Do you have an useful skills that would lend themselves to pirating?”

“I have nothing but my body,” says she, a tear rolling down her cheek. “My father traded that to my husband for a share of his tea company.”

“Well, ma’am,” says I, stiffening and raising to me full height. “I may not be no gentleman, but I do not trade in human flesh. People be free to join me crew, and work for their keep, but they gets an even share of what they earns, and their bodies be their own.”

Her lips twitches in a sort of smile, and I finds meself studying ‘em as if I’ve never seen a lip in me life.

“Do you think I could learn to be useful, Captain?” She’s studying me beard. It’s much more manly than the one sported by her sorry excuse for a husband.

“I believe so, Ma’am,” says I, and I offers her me arm.

“Come with me, I’ll escort you to the ship, and we’ll find you somewhere to sleep.”

She looks to me, then to the captain sized bunk, not a stone’s throw from where she be sittin’, and the heave of her bosom grows quicker.

“Are you in a terrible hurry, Captain?” She stands slow and moves towards me. I feels me jolly roger reach half mast.

“What did you have in mind, ma’am?” I asks.

“Well, do you think I’m appropriately dressed for piracy?” She be so close now I can feel her sweet breath on me neck, and I know what she wants. Me flag is fully flying now, and I wants it to, so I draws me sword and cuts through the laces on her bodice, allowing her frills and the like to fall to the deck.  She looks up at me, not peeved or upset, but a curious expression. “Is this better?” She asks, standing before me, naked and unashamed.

“I’d say so, ma’am, at least from where I be standing,” says I.

“And where are you standing?” she undoes me belt and I lets her.

As me trousers hits the deck, she has me flagpole in her hand, the motion of her soft skin against it enough to make me moan.  She wants it. There’s no question in my mind. No doubt her scrawny husband neither knew nor cared how to please a woman, but I do, and so she’ll have to be patient.  I turns her towards the bed and moves her to it. This is when our lips meet for the first time. As I kiss her I cup her soft breasts in me hands and gently but firmly caress her nipples with me thumbs. She pushes her body closer to me, and moans at the sensation, and I takes the opportunity to taste her. Our tongues rub against each other, frantic with the need. I feel her hands moving against my back and down to me arse, pulling me in, tighter against her. I moves me mouth to her neck and taste down to her breasts, and down, down further. She tastes of the salt of the sea and fresh as the breeze.

“Oh Captain!” she moans.

“Call me Goldcock.” Says I before returning to me feast.

“Goldcock!” She cries again, and again.

When at last me canon is in her porthole we are both ready. It ain’t long until the fuse is burnt and the shot released and I lay atop her, caressing her ivory skin, and staring into her deep pools of eyes.

“I’ve never…” she begins.

“You be free now,” I tells her. “You may do as you please.”

“And what if it pleases me to stay with you?” she asks, almost begging.

“Lady’s choice.” Says I.

Being with her was the happiest I’ve been. We pillaged and plundered and our nights were spent in each other’s arms. But her scrawn husband had the last laugh. He’d done for us both.  He’d been whoring you see. If I hadn’t got ‘im, the clap would. And it got us both. Her being a lady, and a good soul has passed onto a better place. Me being a murdering pirate, I’m doomed to walk this earth for eternity, alone, or so I thought.

Part Two: Holiday Romance

I mostly sticks to beaches for me hauntings. They reminds me of coming ashore, and it amuses me to make footprints appear before folks in the sand. Those land loving dogs fair pisses ‘emselves at ghost prints. I’m really careful to do it only when one person is looking, sowing the seeds of doubt. Makes ‘em think they be crazy. Anyway, one day I was walking along the beach, and there’s these three buxom wenches. They are wearing very little, which I always appreciates, and reading something that was making ‘em cackle like a gaggle of geese.

“No, no,” says one. “It says here that you have to think about the sort of ghost you want. Just close your eyes and think of it, and it’ll come to you. Or maybe in you!” She cackles again.

“I want a pirate!” Says the one with a more ample bosom than the rest. “I’m gunna try right now!” She grins raunchily and lays back on her towel.

Want a pirate do ye? Thinks I as her friends laugh and flick to another page in their publication. I haven’t tupped a female since I’ve been decease, but you don’t forget how it’s done.  She’s lying on her back, eyes closed, hands by her sides, knees raised, legs slightly apart. Like she’s waiting for me. I runs a tentative finger up the outside of her leg, starting at her ankle and finishing at her hip. She makes a soft groaning noise, and shifts slightly. Can she feel me? Sticking with the finger, I moves to her breast, encircling her nipple with the very tip, barely touching her.  She shifts, pushing herself towards me hand. She definitely feels me! I’m taking it seriously now. I leans in and kisses her neck, and she moans and wriggles again. Resting my thigh between hers, I take both hands to her desert islands and caress, rubbing the rock hard peaks firmly with me thumbs. She moans louder and moves her hips up against me, drawing the attention of her crew, who look up from their reading, all perplexed like, to see what the fuss is about.

“Carly?” One of them asks tentatively, but she be lost in me ghostly embrace. If we’d have been alone this would have just been the beginning, and I’d have spent hours pleasing her. I loves the moaning of a wench when all she wants is your saber to run her through, but you makes her wait, and moan until she can barely hold it. But we ain’t alone, and if it goes on too long, these geese’ll stop us.

I moves one down to the well manicured lawn below the islands, and slips me hand between her thighs whilst undoing me belt with the other. She is already wet as the sea and smooth as seaweed and as I push against her, she moans again. It be time to impale her on me long sword, but as I does it, the strangest thing happens.

“Goldcock!” she cries! “Goldcock! Pillage me, Goldcock!”

The shock at her knowing my name almost falters me, but I ain’t that kind of pirate. And me ghost cannon is different, I am able to undulate it, and vibrate it at the frequency of the spirit realm. She’s lost in me now, moaning, and thrusting, slick with sweat and I have to admit, I’m lost in her too. Plunging and withdrawing me sword faster and faster as she moans and cries;

“Goldcock! Don’t stop! Keep going!”

“Carly! This isn’t funny! People are looking!” One of the harpies tries to interrupt us.  But it be too late. We’re done. With a shudder we release.

“What was that?” The harpy demands as my princess lies, drenched in her own sweat and my ectoplasm.

“That was the great pirate Goldcock,” she sighs contentedly as she closes her eyes.

Part Three: Making it Legal

She called to me every night after that, and I would come to her, on her and in her.  I had not had such a sense of purpose since I were alive. And me princess be insatiable. It be nightly, multiple times a night. I don’t have time to haunt or wander the beaches, by the time she’s rested I be so depleted that I vanishes to I don’t know where. Only to be called up again to pleasure her.

I sometimes thought to meself that she thought no more of me than she would of a dildo, just a convenience to satiate her craving for the flagpole. That was until I were summoned to a room full of people.  She were standing in the centre, wearing a white frock. Ironic.

“He’s here,” she announces, as I appear.

“Very well,” a genderless being in long robes and blue glass over its eyes opens a book. “Do you, Carly Rose Flower Pineapple Teflon McBride take Captain Horatio P Goldcock to be your soulmate in spirit, for the rest of eternity?”

“I do!” She trills loudly. Everyone claps.

“And you you, Captain Horatio P Goldcock, of the Bristol Goldcocks take Carly Rose Flower Pineapple Teflon McBride to be your soulmate in spirit for the rest of eternity?”

“Hang on a minute, matey,” I begins. “Eternity is a very long time to be tethered to one wench, even one as shapely as she…”

“He does!” She trills excitedly.

“Then I now proclaim your bond complete! Go forth and be happy!”

I feel like I might have been keelhauled into this. Everyone’s congratulating her on her nuptials and asking what her plans are now.

I reckon my focus will have to be the wedding night…

Thank you for reading this short story. As always, I would love to hear what you think. Pop a comment below. If there is enough interest I could be persuaded to turn this into a book…

The cover was cobbled together with the help of these lovely folks who make their artwork public domain.

Mystic Art Design https://pixabay.com/en/pirate-seafaring-bold-cruise-ship-2135580/

rmt https://pixabay.com/en/bride-wedding-marriage-woman-dress-838218/

GDJ https://pixabay.com/en/boat-galleon-ship-marine-maritime-2858982/

CLKER-Free-Vector-Images https://pixabay.com/en/rooster-chicken-bird-farm-barn-48030/

http://www.lawschoolheretic.com

Competition Time

It’s competition time.

Update! I will also accept pictures of your (fully clothed) torsos as entry, as I would like to make a collage of torsos. If you enter a torso, you are agreeing to its use in my collage!

As you may already know if you follow me on Twitter, I am trying to build a bookworm army. I have named it “The Lesbian and Bisexual Bookworm Army” because I am using it to try and gain visibility for my LesFic, but I’ll take honorary members (ie anyone who wants to join).

It’s been less popular than I was hoping… could be something to do with the way I’m selling it… so I thought I’d have a competition to try and get some new recruits!

During the First World War, Kitchener was able to get recruits using this poster:

And this worked for him, so I thought I’d make my own:

And now I want you guys to spread the word! I want you to take a photo of yourself posing like Kitchener. Add the text I added to my version, and send it to me, either by email, Tweet, or via Facebook. The winning entry will receive a signed book, audiobook code and framed poster, whilst two runners up will receive posters and audiobook codes. Every entry will receive a free ebook.

And if you would like to join the army yourself, you can, either on Twitter, just tweet me and say you’d like to sign up, on Facebook, ask to join the group, or by signing up for my newsletter (which I really don’t send as often as I should).

Now for the boring T&C bits.

By submitting an entry you affirm that you own the copyright of the picture you are submitting, and give C H Clepitt permission to share and use in conjunction with promoting the competition and army.

C H Clepitt reserves the right to void any entry they deem inappropriate, without explanation.

Competition closes on May 1st 2019, and winners will be contacted via the means by which they entered. You give C H Clepitt permission to store your data for the purposes of administrating this competition.

Audio book codes are valid for Audible US or UK

Ebook codes are valid for Smashwords.

No alternative prizes will be offered.

Happy Easter!

 

Hello everyone! Did you follow the link from my newsletter here? Or have you been silently lurking for months, just waiting for me to post something thrilling?! I’d love to know how you found me, so say hello in the comments, would you?

Today I would like to draw your attention to two things. Firstly, my hilarious sci fi satire is free on Kindle over this Easter Weekend, so if you were thinking you’d like to, erm… take a chance on me… now’s the time…

So, anyway, if you want to check out Heels whilst it’s free, get on with it! I’d really appreciate the downloads, followed by the honest reviews. I’m not sure if reviews do anything, but they do make me feel like it’s worth bothering, so you could do that for me… Click here to get your copy!

Wait, what’s that? You came here on an Easter Egg hunt? Well, it wouldn’t exactly be a hunt if it was easy to find, would it? *Rolls eyes* – here you go…